Categories > Celebrities > Panic! At The Disco > My Harlequin Romance

I know my destiny, let me live it

by secretive 2 reviews

Category: Panic! At The Disco - Rating: PG-13 - Genres: Drama - Published: 2011-07-27 - Updated: 2011-07-27 - 2034 words - Complete

The crowd fell deadly silent as they all stared over at Brendon. They all knew his fate was sealed. He stared up at us, taking in each one of our heart-broken faces with his pained eyes. We all exchanged concerned glances as our minds contemplated the situation. Honestly, i didn't even need to decide. I knew my destiny was Brendon, i was nothing without him. "B-bren..." i began, standing up shakily and pacing over to him.
"No..." he interrupted, putting his hand out as if to stop me. I stopped dead in my tracks, staring cautiously at his beautiful face as he closed his eyes, thinking to himself. "Go..." he murmured,
"But Brendon, i can't!" i yelled,
"GO!" he shouted, "all of you... just... you deserve to go," I could hear the obvious pain in his voice. He couldn't really want to be left alone forever, could he? I couldn't leave him, i wouldn't!
"I'm not leaving!" i yelled, still rooted to the spot. Brendon's chocolate eyes widened, he ran his fingers shakily through his messy hair. He slowly paced over to me until he was only about a metre away. We gazed at each other longingly, then suddenly Brendon threw himself at me, our lips colliding almost painfully. He kissed me with such a force that i nearly fell onto the cobbled ground, but i managed to steady myself. I could feel cold, wet tears streaming down Brendon's face as i kissed him passionately. Our lips parted as we kissed each other deeper. I could feel our love flowing into each other as we stayed locked in the embrace. Then Brendon's lips pulled away, but he still grasped me closely in his iron grip. "I love you so much Ryan Ross," he breathed, "You've made the short time I’ve known you, the happiest of my whole life, and I’ll never, ever forget you."
When he finally let me go, I stepped back in amazement. "Forget me?" I asked puzzled, "I'm staying with you!" But Brendon had other plans; he turned around and dashed towards the trapdoor, throwing himself down it. We all darted over to it, but he had managed to barricade the door shut. I fell down onto my knees, banging violently at the door. "BRENDON!" I cried, "OPEN THIS DOOR RIGHT NOW! I'M NOT LEAVING, I'M NEVER LEAVING!" The others stood motionless around me. In their hearts they knew they would be happier going back home to lead a normal life, they wouldn't be forever trapped in one room, but how could they leave the man that had so graciously saved them. The man who had trained painfully for years to create a safe environment for them to hide and live in. They couldn't, could they? They at least needed to talk to Brendon about this first.
"Brendon, come out!" Caden called, "Let's at least talk about this..."
"Yeah please, we're not leaving!" Jo yelled. Anna and Tatiana joined in too as we all begged for him to open the door, but we got no response. I didn't care. I banged my clenched fists on the door so hard I began to bleed. My knuckles felt as though they were going to shatter and my throat was becoming sore from the screaming, but I couldn't leave him. The sooner he realised that, the sooner we could sort this whole thing out.

Mimi lay weak and motionless on the cobbled floor. She heard the screams around her, but managed to blank them out. She had somebody far more important to listen to right now. Over the years, Mimi and Brendon had perfected mental telepathy with each other. That way they didn't even have to see each other to stay best friends. Mimi tuned into Brendon's thoughts, he was sending her a message. She sat up abruptly as she listened.
"Stop!" she called to the shouting, begging crowd. They didn't listen to her straight away, but after a few more shouts they became silent. "He's sending me a message..." Mimi breathed. Ryan's eyes shot up to Mimi. He crawled beside her, his hands bleeding onto the floor as he did so. He moved in front of Mimi, his eyes stabbing into her gaze like gleaming daggers. He took her hand in his own as he waited for Brendon's message. It was as if he were talking to Brendon, not Mimi. This could be the last thing he heard from the man he loved.
"He wants you to know that he's sorry for this whole mess... she sighed, "He says that it was a privilege to know you all, but that porthole won't stay for long, it'll move on soon. This could be your last chance to escape, so... he wants you all to leave, right now."
"No..." Ryan whispered, almost to himself. His eyes stung with tears, which he fought to hold back fiercely. There was no way he would leave. He would rather stay outside the trapdoor and rot then leave Brendon all alone.
"We're not leaving!" Anna shouted willingly, the others agreed with determination.
"Brendon says he wants you all to be happy. He refuses to open the trapdoor, its sealed shut now. He's going to miss you all, but you have to leave. There's no way for you to get back to him now, he wants you to live your life and.... he loves you all, especially you Ryan, you brought him greater happiness than he thought was possible."
The whole group had a tear in their eye, even Mimi as she read out his last words to them. "So that's it then..." Tatiana sniffled, "We can't get to him?"
Mimi sighed, "I'm afraid not, he's used his imagination again. The doors sealed shut..."
"We ... we have to leave...” Jo told us. She turned to Mimi immediately, "You've got to PROMISE us that you'll send him messages from all of us, all the time!" she cried, a glistening tear rolling down her cheek. Mimi nodded, wiping her own tears from under her eyes. The whole group closed in on each other for a hug. They squeezed each other tightly, knowing that now, they had no choice.
"I...I’m sorry..." Mimi sobbed, "This was my entire fault in the first place... this never would've happened if it weren't for me!" She cried hysterically as the group hugged her, muffling her sobs.
Everybody looked around to say their last goodbyes to the world they thought they'd never set foot on again, except Ryan. He sat, his head buried into his knees in the floor. Mimi glanced over to him as she began to receive another message. 'Take Ryan. If you don't he'll be left up here all alone and I couldn't stand that. Make him happy, keep him safe and do whatever it takes to get him out of here. Promise me Mimi, I love you.'

By now my tears had ran dry. They all believed they had no choice but to leave, but they were wrong. They were so wrong! I didn’t care what Brendon said, I’d wait here for him until the end of the world. I’d wait until I died painfully of dehydration or starvation. I’d sit at the trap-door calling for him until the end of time. I was not leaving, they could not make me.
“Tell him we’re so grateful,” Anna sobbed into Mimi’s shoulder, “And we love him.” Mimi nodded as she sent him another telepathic signal. I could tell she didn’t want to leave Brendon either, but it was her duty to save everybody, to make sure they lead happy lives now. Plus she got to communicate with Brendon whenever she wished. I could send him thoughts through her, but if I left, I’d never be able to speak to him properly again. I’d never be able to touch his smooth, milky skin, I’d never be able to stare into his deep, brown eyes and breath to him, ‘I love you’. He’d always be too far from me, I would never be happy without him, and I knew he wouldn’t be happy without me. I couldn’t make him unhappy, it would kill me. I may never see him again, and die banging on that trap door for him, but I had to take the risk.
Anna and Tatiana grasped each other’s hands tightly as they stood in front of the porthole. They gazed in awe at its magnificent glowing blue colours. They took one look back at Mimi, who beckoned them on, and then they looked at each other. “We love you Brendon,” They whispered in sync, then they stepped through the porthole. It swallowed them whole as they disappeared into its icy exterior. They were gone, and I knew that was the last I’d ever see of them, because I wasn’t going with them.
Suddenly, Mimi’s eyes widened in horror as a huge gust of wind blew her hair wildly around her. “The porthole is closing...” she breathed. Sure enough the porthole was slowly decreasing in mass. It was getting smaller, closing in on itself. “WE HAVE TO GO NOW!” Mimi shouted. Caden and Jo grabbed each other’s hands as Mimi almost pushed them through the porthole; it gave off a metallic glow as it began to get smaller and smaller. “Thank you...” Jo called as she disappeared. I knew she was saying it to Brendon, but he couldn’t hear her.
“Ryan MOVE!” Mimi shouted, sticking her hand out for me to come with her. I shook my head,
“I’m not going...” I told her. Her eyes lit up with a flash of panic as she knew she had to somehow make me leave.
“You’ll die here by yourself Ryan!” she shouted, grabbing my arm and trying to drag me up. I forced myself back down.
“I’D RATHER DIE THAN LIVE MY LIFE WITHOUT BRENDON! I WAS NOTHING BEFORE HIM!”I sobbed as Mimi dragged me up to my feet with her surprising strength.
“You won’t be with him, he’s sealed the door!” she pleaded to me, “Please understand, you’ve got to understand!” She gripped my arm almost painfully and dragged me over to the porthole. I kicked and screamed, dragging my feet along the floor, desperately trying to stop her.
“I’ll be near to him here!” I sobbed, “Let me stay, let me stay!” Mimi used her incredible force to push me over to the porthole. I stumbled over and landed with a crack onto my back. I groaned in pain as I managed to drag myself back to my knees. I could feel the force of the porthole behind me, dragging me in. “I’M NOT GOING!” I cried, “I CAN’T LEAVE HIM MIMI, PLEASE DON’T MAKE ME LEAVE HIM ALONE!” Mimi’s heart wrenched as she tried to drag me away, she hated this, but she’d promised Brendon she’d do whatever it took to take me with her. And she intended to keep her promise. I screamed as she dragged me to my feet, the porthole behind me was small now, only just big enough for us to get through. “I’m.. s-so. Sorry R-Ryan,” she sobbed as she held me by my arm, ready to push me in, ready to take away my whole world.
I couldn’t let her. Normally Mimi could control a scrawny young thing like me, but my determination and love willed me on. I fought against her, kicking her hard in the shin. She stumbled backwards, loosening her grip on me. “I’m so sorry!” I cried, “But I’m not leaving him! I can’t leave him, he’s my world!” I placed my hand onto Mimi’s chest and forced her a smile as I pushed her through the porthole, watching it swallow her. I thought it was over, until I felt her hand grabbing my ankle, dragging me in with her. I screamed as I felt myself losing my grip, “BRENDON!” I screamed, but it was too late.
Sign up to rate and review this story