Categories > Cartoons > Class of the Titans > A Series of Unfortunate Descendents
Chapter 2: Gems of Wisdom
7 reviewsIf Artemis had ever met Patroclus and Briseis, you can bet it probably would have gone better than the impromptu meeting their descendents had.
1Funny
Archie ran into Atlanta's dorm room and slammed the door, causing the fiery haired girl to jump and spin around, striking a battle stance. Seeing that it was merely her best friend, she relaxed, but tensed up again when she saw he was panting and was, oddly enough, without his trademark blue hoody.
"What's wrong?" She asked, walking over to him. "Is Cronus back?"
"No... not Cronus... crazy stalker girl... Patroclus... took sweater..." Archie managed to say between huffs and puffs.
Atlanta raised an eyebrow and calmed again, though she was now utterly confused. "A crazy stalker girl named Patroclus took your sweater?" To this, Archie nodded vigorously. The hunter rolled her eyes, shoving Archie out of the way, grabbing the knob and about to open the door. "You're crazy, look, there's no crazy stalker girl out there. It's probably just Herry playing a joke on you."
Archie made a frantic motion, hands waving erratically as if to say "No no no no no!" and let out a strangled cry, but it was too late. Before Atlanta had the chance to open the door more than two inches, it burst forth as if of its own accord. The accord, however, was of a tall blonde girl holding a familiar blue sweater in her hands.
"Archie-kins! What do you think you're doing, running away from me like that?" She giggled, as Archie glared at Atlanta, before adapting a rather sullen and defeated expression. "Look, you sprinted off so fast you even forgot your sweater with me, silly!"
Archie managed to say something along the line of a thank you through gritted teeth, accepting his hoody back and thinking, I wouldn't be surprised if she smelled it. He had known the descendent of Patroclus for no more than five hours, but he could already tell he'd had more than he could handle. She had barely let him out of her sight the entire time, constantly pestering him with questions about his heel, and how fast he could run, and if he could throw a spear, and if he was invincible just like Achilles. Archie was ready to throw a spear at her by now.
Atlanta cleared her throat, catching the attention of the blathering blonde girl. Turning to observe the descendent of Artemis, Patricia's genuinely sugar sweet smile faded to an uptight, high strung expression.
"Oh, who's this, Archie?" Patricia looked down her nose at Atlanta, which wasn't particularly difficult considering the blonde was a few inches taller than her.
"This is my... friend, Atlanta," Archie hated just calling her a friend all the time, but a friend she'd have to stay until he got up enough courage to tell her how he really felt about her.
"I... see. So, what were you two doing?" Patricia asked in an accusatory tone. Archie rolled his eyes, while Atlanta glared at the stranger, already knowing she didn't like this girl at all. Archie was about ready to bolt again, or he would have already if Patricia wasn't blocking the only exit. He prayed to the Gods that he'd live this down one day. Archie was contemplating jumping out the window soon enough, and just when he was sure that moment couldn't possibly get any worse ...
"Archie! Ares told me that he wants you to go get in some extra practice time before training. In any case, I was wondering if I could maybe watch..." Brien's effeminate voice faded as he entered the room, observing both Patricia and Atlanta. "Oh, I see you have... company," he decided to ignore Atlanta for the moment and leer at his first enemy. "Don't you think you've stalked him enough for one day, Patricia?"
"I am not stalking him, Brien, Archie likes my company, don't you, Archie-kins?" Patricia asked sweetly, snuggling up against him as he tried desperately not to cringe.
"Uh... sure..." He muttered, while thinking something along the lines of, Yeah, I like you like I like skin cancer.
Brien humphed, his gaze turning to Atlanta, making quite an obvious show of looking her up and down and not bothering to hide the hint of disgust on his face. "And who's this?"
"Atlanta," Patricia said in a vicious, toxic tone. Atlanta rolled her eyes, giving Archie a very objective stare.
Knowing it couldn't possibly get worse now, Archie managed to push Patricia off him. "Uh, Brien, tell Ares I'll be there in half an hour. I really have to study-"
"With her?" Brien cut in, glaring at Atlanta again, who was very, very close to knocking both Brien's and Patricia's heads together violently.
"Yeah, uh, Atlanta's the only one with the same class this semester," Archie knew he wasn't very good at lying, but he also knew Patricia wasn't very bright and Brien was too occupied glaring at Atlanta. "... So, I'll see you guys later!" Archie mustered the strength to push them both out the door, even while Brien yelled something about Ares not being pleased, and Patricia begging to study with them. With the door finally shut, Archie locked it as soon as he could and slid to the ground, exhausted.
"I am so sorry. I didn't know they were so close behind me," Archie sat cross legged and buried his face in his hands.
"Who the hell were they?" Atlanta asked, not sounding pleased at all.
"The descendents of Patroclus and Briseis," he muttered into his palms.
Atlanta rolled her eyes. "More like the descendents of Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Dum," to this, Archie gave a short, bitter laugh. "So, care to explain?"
Archie groaned again. "Why am I the only one that's read the Iliad?" Atlanta didn't respond, so he continued. "During the Trojan war, a girl named Briseis was taken as a prisoner and given to Achilles as a gift from Agamemnon. They became lovers, but then Briseis was taken from him. Briseis was given back to him again, and Achilles and she were going to sail away and begin a new life, when Patroclus died in battle, mistaken for Achilles. Achilles got angry and went to war, and that's when he died."
"Okay, I get why Brien might have a thing for you, but what's with Patricia? Brotherly love?" Atlanta raised an eyebrow questioningly.
The unfortunate descendent of Achilles sighed exasperatedly. "I wish. Patroclus and Achilles were..." Archie paused, blushing madly, "lovers."
Atlanta grinned, barely stifling a laugh. "Wow, Cronus has reached a whole new level of evil."
"I'll say."
"So what, you're just gonna hide out here for half an hour?" Atlanta decided to turn his mind to different aspects.
Archie looked up apologetically. "Please don't make me go back out there. I swear, Patricia will rip off my shorts next, and Brien will be there enjoying the view." Atlanta had never heard Archie beg before, so she knew he was serious.
"No problem, but you have got to do something about them," she said, sitting down beside her friend.
"Yeah, thanks for that gem of wisdom," he groaned, as they both laughed lightly before resolving to talk of less frightening subjects.
"What's wrong?" She asked, walking over to him. "Is Cronus back?"
"No... not Cronus... crazy stalker girl... Patroclus... took sweater..." Archie managed to say between huffs and puffs.
Atlanta raised an eyebrow and calmed again, though she was now utterly confused. "A crazy stalker girl named Patroclus took your sweater?" To this, Archie nodded vigorously. The hunter rolled her eyes, shoving Archie out of the way, grabbing the knob and about to open the door. "You're crazy, look, there's no crazy stalker girl out there. It's probably just Herry playing a joke on you."
Archie made a frantic motion, hands waving erratically as if to say "No no no no no!" and let out a strangled cry, but it was too late. Before Atlanta had the chance to open the door more than two inches, it burst forth as if of its own accord. The accord, however, was of a tall blonde girl holding a familiar blue sweater in her hands.
"Archie-kins! What do you think you're doing, running away from me like that?" She giggled, as Archie glared at Atlanta, before adapting a rather sullen and defeated expression. "Look, you sprinted off so fast you even forgot your sweater with me, silly!"
Archie managed to say something along the line of a thank you through gritted teeth, accepting his hoody back and thinking, I wouldn't be surprised if she smelled it. He had known the descendent of Patroclus for no more than five hours, but he could already tell he'd had more than he could handle. She had barely let him out of her sight the entire time, constantly pestering him with questions about his heel, and how fast he could run, and if he could throw a spear, and if he was invincible just like Achilles. Archie was ready to throw a spear at her by now.
Atlanta cleared her throat, catching the attention of the blathering blonde girl. Turning to observe the descendent of Artemis, Patricia's genuinely sugar sweet smile faded to an uptight, high strung expression.
"Oh, who's this, Archie?" Patricia looked down her nose at Atlanta, which wasn't particularly difficult considering the blonde was a few inches taller than her.
"This is my... friend, Atlanta," Archie hated just calling her a friend all the time, but a friend she'd have to stay until he got up enough courage to tell her how he really felt about her.
"I... see. So, what were you two doing?" Patricia asked in an accusatory tone. Archie rolled his eyes, while Atlanta glared at the stranger, already knowing she didn't like this girl at all. Archie was about ready to bolt again, or he would have already if Patricia wasn't blocking the only exit. He prayed to the Gods that he'd live this down one day. Archie was contemplating jumping out the window soon enough, and just when he was sure that moment couldn't possibly get any worse ...
"Archie! Ares told me that he wants you to go get in some extra practice time before training. In any case, I was wondering if I could maybe watch..." Brien's effeminate voice faded as he entered the room, observing both Patricia and Atlanta. "Oh, I see you have... company," he decided to ignore Atlanta for the moment and leer at his first enemy. "Don't you think you've stalked him enough for one day, Patricia?"
"I am not stalking him, Brien, Archie likes my company, don't you, Archie-kins?" Patricia asked sweetly, snuggling up against him as he tried desperately not to cringe.
"Uh... sure..." He muttered, while thinking something along the lines of, Yeah, I like you like I like skin cancer.
Brien humphed, his gaze turning to Atlanta, making quite an obvious show of looking her up and down and not bothering to hide the hint of disgust on his face. "And who's this?"
"Atlanta," Patricia said in a vicious, toxic tone. Atlanta rolled her eyes, giving Archie a very objective stare.
Knowing it couldn't possibly get worse now, Archie managed to push Patricia off him. "Uh, Brien, tell Ares I'll be there in half an hour. I really have to study-"
"With her?" Brien cut in, glaring at Atlanta again, who was very, very close to knocking both Brien's and Patricia's heads together violently.
"Yeah, uh, Atlanta's the only one with the same class this semester," Archie knew he wasn't very good at lying, but he also knew Patricia wasn't very bright and Brien was too occupied glaring at Atlanta. "... So, I'll see you guys later!" Archie mustered the strength to push them both out the door, even while Brien yelled something about Ares not being pleased, and Patricia begging to study with them. With the door finally shut, Archie locked it as soon as he could and slid to the ground, exhausted.
"I am so sorry. I didn't know they were so close behind me," Archie sat cross legged and buried his face in his hands.
"Who the hell were they?" Atlanta asked, not sounding pleased at all.
"The descendents of Patroclus and Briseis," he muttered into his palms.
Atlanta rolled her eyes. "More like the descendents of Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Dum," to this, Archie gave a short, bitter laugh. "So, care to explain?"
Archie groaned again. "Why am I the only one that's read the Iliad?" Atlanta didn't respond, so he continued. "During the Trojan war, a girl named Briseis was taken as a prisoner and given to Achilles as a gift from Agamemnon. They became lovers, but then Briseis was taken from him. Briseis was given back to him again, and Achilles and she were going to sail away and begin a new life, when Patroclus died in battle, mistaken for Achilles. Achilles got angry and went to war, and that's when he died."
"Okay, I get why Brien might have a thing for you, but what's with Patricia? Brotherly love?" Atlanta raised an eyebrow questioningly.
The unfortunate descendent of Achilles sighed exasperatedly. "I wish. Patroclus and Achilles were..." Archie paused, blushing madly, "lovers."
Atlanta grinned, barely stifling a laugh. "Wow, Cronus has reached a whole new level of evil."
"I'll say."
"So what, you're just gonna hide out here for half an hour?" Atlanta decided to turn his mind to different aspects.
Archie looked up apologetically. "Please don't make me go back out there. I swear, Patricia will rip off my shorts next, and Brien will be there enjoying the view." Atlanta had never heard Archie beg before, so she knew he was serious.
"No problem, but you have got to do something about them," she said, sitting down beside her friend.
"Yeah, thanks for that gem of wisdom," he groaned, as they both laughed lightly before resolving to talk of less frightening subjects.
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