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Ayasha forced her mind to work. “Who does not speak Cherokee?”

Opal took another sip of water before answering. “The one who is here, the one who like yourself is searching for direction.”

“Can you see him?”

“No.” Opal answered softly. “But I could sense his presence as soon as I walked through the door. He now lives between the worlds, correct?”

Ayasha nodded.

Opal turned to look at the painting on the easel. “A vision?”

Her whole body trembling now Ayasha answered slowly, “His vision. I painted it earlier today.”

“Then you burned the wood and asked for direction.” It was not a question.

“Yes.”

Opal stood slowly then walked over to the painting. “When he saw this vision did he ask for direction?”

Gerard was sitting quietly watching Opal.

“He did.” Ayasha answered.

Opal continued to stare at the picture. “The answer troubled him.”

Ayasha turned to Gerard, her eyes pleading with him. Should she tell Opal about the vision? Should she reveal the word that the vision gave him? While Ayasha believed Opal offered them hope she was not sure if he felt the same way.

Gerard looked into Ayasha’s eyes. “I don’t know what to think.” He said slowly.

Opal had turned and was looking at Ayasha. “He appears as flesh and blood to you.”

Ayasha’s head snapped around to look at Opal. There was no way to avoid the truth. “Yes.”

“You see him, you can touch him?”

“He is very real to me.” Ayasha said softly. “As am I to him.” Believing this woman held the answers she’d prayed for Ayasha continued, “When I am here, he is here but when I leave this house…”

“He too leaves.” Opal nodded. “He retreats to the darkness.”

“Please tell me what this all means.” Ayasha pleaded.

Opal once more took her seat. “Does he understand it is only his spirit body that is here?”

“He knows he is truly in a coma.”

“I see.” Opal said slowly.

“I need to help him return to his life.” Ayasha said in a rush. “Do you know what I should do?”

Opal sighed, “It is his wish to return?”

“Of course.” Ayasha answered. “He wants to return to his life.”

“And yet I sense his reluctance to leave this place.”

This is what Ayasha had feared. “No, he knows he must go back to his life or he will…”

“Sugar, you know what’s she’s saying is right.” Gerard said softly touching Ayasha’s hand.

“Die.” Opal finished Ayasha’s sentence. “Does he fear death?”

“No.” Ayasha shook off his hand. Ignoring Opal’s question she said, “He must go back to his life. I’m sure he is here because I’m meant to help him do that.”

Opal tilted her head to look into Ayasha’s eyes. “I almost didn’t recognize you at first.”

Immediately Ayasha began speaking in Cherokee. Gerard understood whatever she was saying to Opal she didn’t want him to understand. Opal listened nodding.

“Ayasha please stop that.” Gerard said trying to control his anger. He wanted to understand everything that was happening.

Opal now understood much more. “Ominotago was very wise.”

Gerard recognized Ayasha’s grandmother’s name. “She knew her?”

Ayasha gave up trying not to speak to him. “Obviously but I’m still confused.”

Opal smiled, “You’ve told him about your grandmother.”

“Yes.” Ayasha nodded. “I have told him about her.”

“I wonder how much.”

The question was one Ayasha didn’t want to address. “I do not remember you.”

Opal reached for her glass of water. After taking a small sip she spoke. “I arrived less than six months before Ominotago’s death. However in that short time she and I became very close. Often I turned to her for help dealing with my young grandson. In turn she often asked for my wisdom in dealing with her young granddaughter.”

Ayasha’s guilt caused anger. “Well your words of advice did not help.”

Opal smiled sadly. “You were hot headed, young and angry. Confused and hurt. I could see that in your eyes the few times we met.”

“I don’t remember you.” Ayasha said looking down. “But everything you said is correct. I was out of control and I hurt my grandmother very much.”

“She understood you anger was not truly directed at her.” Opal said softly. “She loved you very much.”

“And I loved her.” Ayasha whispered. “She was all I had in this world.”

Opal settled back in the chair. “And like me she made jewelry.”

Gerard saw Ayasha’s whole body tense.

“Yes.” The word was uttered in anger. “We already discussed that.”

“I was with her then.” Opal said softly.

Ayasha responded but not in English.

“Please stop speaking in Cherokee.” Gerard said when Ayasha fell silent. “I want to know everything that’s being said.”

Ayasha ignored him while staring at Opal.

Opal nodded then turned her attention back to the painting of the vision. “What direction was he given?”

“Tell her.” Gerard said touching Ayasha’s arm.

“One word.” Ayasha answered slowly, “Truth.”

Opal nodded. “And your vision? Did you also receive direction?”

As of yet Ayasha had not shared her vision with Gerard so her answer was only a simple yes.

Opal looked deeply into her eyes. “Did you understand?”

Ayasha sighed, “I’m still not sure I understood it.”

“But you understood his?’

“He did.” Ayasha answered in confusion.

“You told me it troubled him.”

“Yes, but he did understand.”

“But did you?”

“I’m confused.” Ayasha admitted. “I just told you he understood and yes, he did explain it to me.”

“He explained what the word meant to him.”

Ayasha nodded.

“But do you understand what it means to you?”

“It was his vision.” Ayasha said trying to make sense of the conversation.

“Yet you painted it.”

Nervously Ayasha reached for her glass of ice water. “Yes, I did.” She answered before taking a sip.

“You still don’t understand.” Opal said sadly. “You and this man are connected. His vision was not only meant for him, it was meant for you. Just as your vision was not just your own, it is also his.”

Her hands were shaking so badly that some of the water sloshed out on the table as she set the glass down. “What?”

“Truth, Little One. The word, the direction was also given to you.”

Ayasha stared at her in shock. “I don’t understand.”

Opal sighed, “Yes, you do. Your heart understands completely, it is Cherokee. It is your mind that is keeping you from seeing, from understanding.”

For a moment Ayasha closed her eyes as the truth forced its way into her mind.

“Your heart has known all along. You must admit the truth.” When Ayasha didn’t answer Opal asked, “And your vision, does it make sense now?’

Slowly Ayasha nodded, “Yes, but what it revealed isn’t possible.”

“Many things our minds tell us are impossible are possible.”

While understanding she must reveal the truth it would come later. Ayasha began to speak in Cherokee again and this time Opal answered in the same language.

Gerard leaned back and folded his arms. He forced himself to believe that whatever was going on Ayasha would explain to him once Opal was gone.

Once Ayasha had spoken the words she didn’t want him to hear yet she returned to English. “I have been a fool.” She said softly.

Gerard scooted over and placed his arm around her shoulder.

Opal shook her head. “No, only a fool never admits their mistakes.”

“I have promised him and myself I will do everything in my power to help him return to his life.”

“And you are prepared to accept what that may mean?”

Ayasha nodded.

“Ominotago often spoke of your strength. She was correct, you are strong, Little One.”

“Often I have not been strong.”

“Only a fool believes they are strong at all times. No one is always strong. You have faced many challenges in your life, yet you have survived. Often I prayed for you.”

“You did?”

Opal smiled, “Yes, and I will continue to do so. For so long my prayer had been that you would return. When you ran away my heart was saddened. First by the loss of my friend Ominotogo and then by the loss of your departure. My heart had a moment of hope when I was told you were being returned to us but that never happened.”

Again Ayasha was shocked, “You knew they’d found me and planned to bring me back?”

“They were bringing you back to live with me. I was the one who’d offered to open my home to you.”

“Oh.” Ayasha whispered. “I didn’t know that. They never told me who’d agreed to take me in.”

“Would it have mattered?”

Sadly Ayasha knew that back then it would have made no difference to her. “No, I suppose it wouldn’t have. The only thought I had in my mind was to run, to get away and never return.”

“Do you still feel that way?”

The question caught Ayasha off guard. “I haven’t given it any thought. I have made a home for myself here. Here, I have found peace.”

“Until I showed up.” Gerard muttered.

Not caring if Opal saw or heard she turned to him. “That’s not true.” She said making herself admit the truth. “In a way I was still running. I refused to trust people, I was living almost entirely alone except for my one huge mistake.”

He understood she was talking about Kyle.

“But you’ve made me realize so much about myself.” Ayasha said looking into his eyes. “You’ve brought about a change in me.”

“And have you changed him?” Opal asked watching the exchange.

Gerard smiled, “Tell her you’ve made me what to be a better man.”

“He says I have changed him too.” Ayasha said softly still look at Gerard.

“As I have said Ominotago was wise.” Opal said.

Ayasha tore her gaze from Gerard to look at the woman. “And yet..”

Opal held up her hand. “The journey can not begin until the truth is revealed.”

“I understand that now.” Ayasha whispered. “My heart and mind now think as one.”

The sound of a knock on the door caused Ayasha to sigh. “That must be your grandson.”

Opal stood slowly. “Yes it is time for me to go.” She started towards the door.

Ayasha stood to catch up with her. “Thank you for coming.”

Without a word the woman held open her arms and Ayasha walked into them without pause.

Gerard watched the old woman hug Ayasha tightly then release her.

“I am glad fate led me to you.” Opal said.

“Yes.” Ayasha blinked back tears.

Opal looked into her eyes. “I do not have many more years on this earth but my heart tells me we will meet again.”

Not understanding why Ayasha too felt this way. She smiled then pulled open the door.

As their trailer pulled out of sight she closed the door then turned slowly.

“I’m really confused about what just happened.” Gerard admitted. He was still seated on the sofa watching Ayasha’s face closely.

Ayasha looked at him a moment then her head dropped. “I…” She sighed deeply. “I understand so much more but I’m not sure it matters now.”

“Because we both know I’m dying.” Gerard said softly.

Her head snapped up. “No.”

Gerard smiled, “Honey, I know it’s not what you want to hear but neither of us can deny I’m growing weaker every day. The darkness pulls me in, it don’t want to let me go.” He glanced at the painting. “I waited too long to admit the truth, I’ve lost my chance to decide if I wanted to go back to my life.”

Ayasha took several steps towards him then stopped. “Think about your life. Think about your family, think about your daughter. You want to return to them.”

“Yes, I do wish that could happen but at the same time my heart doesn’t want to leave you.”

Here eyes filled with tears which she refused to shed. “You have to leave me to go back to them. It’s what’s right and we both know that.”

Silence filled the room as they both were lost in thought.

“The truth.” Ayasha finally whispered to herself. “The journey can not begin but the truth is revealed.”

Gerard looked at her in confusion. “I don’t understand. What truth, I’ve admitted the truth.”

“Gee, I know you heard her say that your vision was also meant for me.”

He nodded, “Yeah, I heard that but there was a lot that was said that I didn’t understand.”

“I’m sorry.” Ayasha replied knowing he was upset she and Opal had conversed in Cherokee.

“But you’re gonna tell me, right?”

She had made her decision. “I’ll be right back.” She walked into the bathroom then closed the door. A minute later she reemerged and headed directly to her desk. Gerard watched as she pulled open a drawer searching for something. Her eyes downcast she walked back over to the sofa to hand him a photo. Without looking at her he took the old black and white snap shot. “This is your grandmother?” He guessed looking at the older Native American woman dressed in clothing very similar to what Opal had worn.

“Yes, that is Grandmother and me. It was taken when I was about seven.”

He lifted the photo to take a better look. His mind was confused by what he saw.

Ayasha placed another item in front of the photo. “This was my first ID. It was taken not long after I arrived here.” She sat down beside him.

He took the plastic coated card in his fingers. The photo was small, it was definitely Ayasha but it looked wrong. “I don’t get it.” He said finally turning to look at her. It was then he saw the truth. “Your eyes.”

“Stupidly I believed in some way that if I made myself look more Cherokee I would become Cherokee not only in my heart but mind.”

He stared into her blue eyes. “You’ve been wearing brown contacts?”

“You said once you didn’t understand why it bothered me so much being a half breed. You said I looked Native American. The truth is I dye my hair.” She nodded to the ID still in his hand. “That is my natural hair color and this is my true eye color.”

“You said looks can be deceiving.” He whispered remembering the conversation. He stared at her letting the truth sink in. “So you really have light brown hair?”

She nodded.

“And beautiful blue eyes.”

Those eyes once more filled with tears she quickly blinked away.

He was still very confused. “I understand you want to look more Cherokee but why did you think this would upset me?”

Ayasha bit her bottom lip nervously. “I didn’t think it would upset you in that way.”

Gerard set the photo and ID down on the table beside him then turned to face her. “Ayasha what’s going on? What did you and Opal talk about?”

“Her visit made me face something I’d refused to believe until now.” She said softly. “All this time I have been saying I knew there had to be a reason you were here and I did really mean that but I refused to let myself face the truth.”

Slowly he was beginning to piece things together. “She said we share a connection.”

Ayasha nodded.

He was trying to recall the conversation. “And that connection was why my vision was also meant for you.”

Again she nodded.

He took her hand in his. “Do you know what that connection is? Is that what’s going on?”

“I’ve known in my heart all along.” She whispered. “But I wouldn’t let myself believe.”

“Sugar, help me out here. I’m trying to understand.”

She blinked rapidly. “To explain, for it to maybe make some sense to you, I had to show you.” Her gaze went over to the items he’d set on the table.

“You had to show me you really don’t have brown eyes and black hair?”

An overwhelming feeling of hopeless washed over her. “It doesn’t matter. You don’t remember.” She whispered looking down.

“Remember?” His grip tightened on her hand automatically. “Remember what?”

She looked up. “That we had met before.”

Of all the things she could have said this was something he’d never expected. “We met before?”

Pulling her hand from his grip she nodded, “Yes, years ago.” She suddenly sat up straighter then took a deep breath. “I did not expect you to remember me. We spoke only a few moments.”

He was searching his brain. “When?”

“The only time I have ever seen you perform live. That July day at the Warped tour.”

“Ayasha, please tell me what happened that day.” He begged wanting so badly to remember.

Her mind traveled back to the hot July afternoon. “I told you how I’d gotten there, about the kids who’d given me a ride.”

He nodded.

“It was getting late in the day and everyone was so hot and tired but no one wanted to leave yet. We saw some of the bands were out talking to fans so we walked over. You and Frank were there. One of the girls I was with was a huge fan of My Chemical Romance so she grabbed my hand and pulled me with her over to where you and Frank stood. To be honest I really wasn’t interested so I stood behind her while she talked to you.” She paused as the memory of that day became clearer. “It was so strange, suddenly as I listened to your voice…”She shook her head, “I don’t know but for some reason I found myself drawn to your voice.”

Gerard sat silently waiting for her to continue.

“But it was more than your voice, it was what I saw when I looked in your eyes.”

This time when she grew silent he couldn’t wait. “I don’t understand, you think you saw something in my eyes?”

“I did see something in your eyes, something I didn’t understand but it made me do something I felt from deep in my heart was right.”

Again he wished with all his heart he could remember something about that day.

“I handed you something.” Ayasha said softly, “Something that was very dear to me. Something my grandmother had made.”

“What was it?”

Suddenly she stood. “It doesn’t matter. I believed a few minutes later that I’d made a mistake and I was angry.” She moved across the room suddenly needing to put distance between them. “You said thanks then someone called out your name. I saw as you walked away you handed it to a guy who was walking next to you. I felt so stupid. It was precious to me, my grandmother had made it and it was gone.”

It hurt him to know that his actions that day had caused her pain. “Ayasha I wish I could remember.”

She took a deep breath to get her emotions under control then spoke. “Gee, I’m not upset you don’t remember. I’m just trying to explain how I felt that day. I was angry and hurt but not towards you, not really. Grandmother had told me the necklace did not belong to me.” She shook her head, “I was such a bitch to her about it. When she gave it to me a few months before her death I remember being so happy. I loved it so much but then she told me that it didn’t belong to me, that I was to keep it until I found who it truly belong to. That day something in my heart told me I’d found the true owner. But still I didn’t want to believe. I told myself that it was just a stupid necklace and that I should have kept it not given it away to someone I’d just met and would never meet again.”

“But you did meet that man again.” Gerard said softly.

She looked into this eyes, “Yes, but still I refused to believe. When you first appeared I remembered the necklace, but I refused to let myself believe it could be the reason you were here.” Moving back to the sofa she sat. “Gee, I still don’t understand all of this. Why would giving you that necklace all those years ago cause this to happen?”

“Tell me what it looked like.”

“The pendant was carved out of antler. On each side there were two small quartz crystals.”

“Suspended on two straps of leather.” Gerard’s eyes grew wide. “Ayasha I remember it.”

Her heart began to race but she refused to let herself find hope. “You couldn’t”

“I do.” He answered nodding. While still saddened he didn’t remember her, he did remember the gift she’d given him. “The guy I handed it to was one of our roadies. I remember that night when I went to my bunk I found it. When I looked at it closely I could see the workmanship that had gone into making it.” Suddenly it was as if he was reliving that night. “I laid in my bunk looking at it a long time wondering if there was some significance to the placement of the crystals or the carving etched on the pendant.”

Ayasha was shocked beyond words to realize the gift she’d believe had meant nothing to him had actually made an impression on his mind.

“Did it mean something special?” He asked.

Her heart hurt knowing her beloved Grandmother had tried to explain the necklace to her only to meet with Ayasha’s anger and ridicule. “I’m trying to remember.” She whispered.

Gerard too was searching his mind for some of the knowledge he’d recently gained on the Cherokee. “Quartz crystals are for healing of the mind, right?”

“Yes.” Ayasha nodded excitedly. “That’s right. But there is something about the etching…”

“It looks like some sort of tree branch.”

“Cedar.” Ayasha whispered as it all became so clear. “The etching is that of a branch of cedar.”

“Wait, I read about some legend.” Gerard started to rise to grab one of the books he’d poured over about Cherokee legend but Ayasha stopped him.

“Cedar is used for protection.”

He nodded, “Right, I remember that but there is a legend about it.”

“I know the legend.” Ayasha said softly. “In the beginning the Cherokee people were new upon the earth and they felt out of the fear caused by darkness that there should be no night so they asked the Great Spirit to made the sun shine always. But soon they realized their mistake. The sun shone brightly each day. Soon the forests grew too thick to walk through, weeds filled their gardens, and the heat became too much. So they beseeched the Great Spirit to take away the sun and make it always night. The Great Spirit wondered why his people didn’t understand twos…. “

“What?”

Ayasha smiled, “Twos. Night and day, good and evil, life and death.”

“Got it.” He smiled, “Go on.”

“But once again they’d made a mistake. Darkness covered the land. Soon, the crops stopped growing and it became very cold. The people spent much of their time gathering wood for the fires. They could not see to hunt meat and with no crops growing it was not long before the people were cold, weak and very hungry. Many of the people died. Those that remained still living gathered once again to beseech The Great Spirit. Again they cried out they’d made a mistake. They realized the day and night had been perfect and as it should be from the beginning. Once again He listened to their request and day and night became as it had been in the beginning. The Great Spirit was pleased when the people thanked him. He accepted their gratitude. But during the time of the long day of night many of the people had perished. He was sorry and placed their spirits in a newly created tree.” She paused “The tree was named a-tsi-na tlu-gv”

“Cedar”

Ayasha nodded, “Yes. The Cedar. It is said that when you smell the aroma of the cedar tree or gaze upon it remember you are Cherokee, you are looking upon those ancestors. Tradition holds that the wood of the cedar holds powerful protective spirits.”

“Long day of night.” Gerard repeated the words slowly.

Ayasha understood immediately, “The darkness of the coma.”

He nodded as he reached for both of her hands. “The pendant with the crystals for healing of the mind, with the etching of the cedar. The necklace was meant for me. You were meant to give it to me.”

“But I still don’t understand it all.” Ayasha said feeling overwhelmed by their thoughts. “I gave it to you but…”

“The fact you gave it to me is our connection, it is what brought me here to you.”

“But it did not protect you from the coma.”

His heart was filled with hope. “But maybe it can help me find my way out of the darkness. Ayasha, I still have the necklace. I’ve kept it all these years.”

“You still have it?”

“Yeah, in my apartment in LA. It’s in a box…” Suddenly he face fell.

“What?”

“That night, my anger.”

Her heart was beating so hard the sound filled her ears. “What happened?”

“I saw it.” He said softly letting his mind once more return to that fateful night. “When I got home I was so angry, so filled with rage. I remember going into my bedroom and standing in front of the dresser. I saw my reflection in the mirror and I hated the man staring back at me. It was then I decided I couldn’t take it anymore. I had a bottle of whiskey in my hand. I drank it all then put the bottle down on the dresser. It hit the wooden box then fell over and that pissed me off. I grabbed the bottle intending to smash it against the mirror when I saw that the box had fallen over and had opened. The necklace was laying there.” He stopped, running his hand over his face. “I don’t know why but I remember suddenly my anger was gone. I set the bottle down…”

Ayasha searched his face, “What happened?”

His eyes filled with tears. “I looked at myself one last time in the mirror…then I went into the bathroom and swallowed the pills.”

She pulled him into her arms as his tears fell. He cried unashamedly as she murmured words of comfort in his ear. He didn’t stop until she whispered “I understand my vision now.”