Categories > Books > Harry Potter > Perfect Shades of Indigo
Reviews
Perfect Shades of Indigo
(#) Inziladun 2006-09-23
First, I really liked your fic.
Second, I'm spanish, so I thought that maybe you'll like if I told you about those sentences: "dónde usted puso mi camisa" should be "dónde puso usted mi camisa" (in south-america) or "dónde pusiste mi camisa" (in spain);
"Doy para arriba", "Doy" is like "give" so I'm asuming that you are meaning to say "I'm going upstairs" or something similar, in which case it should be: "Voy para arriba" (I suposse this is just a mistake while you were writing on the computer);
and finally: "Usted tiene que aprender confiar en a gente otra vez, Maria. No es el ser sano un ermitaño" it may be better: "Usted tiene que aprender a confiar en la gente otra vez, Maria" (south-america)/"Tienes que aprender a confiar en la gente otra vez, Maria" (spain) "No es sano ser ermitaño" (althoug instead of emitaño it could be huraño, which is somebody who is not confortable around people and prefers to be alone).
Well, I hope that you update soon.Perfect Shades of Indigo
(#) DeathKeeper 2006-09-23
Wow your story is outstanding can't wait to read the next chapter.Perfect Shades of Indigo
(#) ilex 2006-09-27
I am DYING to see everyone reactions to Harry without the Glam spell in place.
This should be QUITE interesting.
And Harry knows Albus pretty well, with the hidden meaning in the letter and all.
And Peach! Horny devil!
HE!HE!HE!Perfect Shades of Indigo
(#) AndromedaKitty 2006-09-28
I love this story! I can't wait to read more! Please update soon! :DPerfect Shades of Indigo
(#) patronus 2006-09-30
This is a very nice story, pretty original, and so far very promising!
I am not an angst fan but if there is humor and some fluff I think I will like it very much!
Also I speak Spanish and you have some mistakes such as : Doy para arriba! I give up… arriba is like up as in ceiling or sky . The saying should be: me rindo, or, renuncio. If you have some short phrase you need to translate just e mail me to ikarykun01 yahoo com ar, and I´ll try to send you an answer.
well, good luck !!!Perfect Shades of Indigo
(#) comp_wiz101 2006-10-02
Excellent! It's about time I saw a story with an OC that isn't mary-sued. :)Perfect Shades of Indigo
(#) pazed 2006-10-08
Very interesting and enjoyable. I like Maria. And Peach.
In Ch 5 did you really mean the Snape plot? Or the Thorne plot ... if it was Snape, Maria wouldn't have inherited.
I take it she didn't get a Hogwartys letter because Indigo magic is different.
I did think Harry really should have portkeyed out a bit sooner, but I guess I'll accept that he was dazed as you obviiously need things that way for your plot.
Look forward to more, thanks.Perfect Shades of Indigo
(#) anteryami 2006-11-08
This ia a very good story that I have read. It is completely different from many other stories that I have read. I would like to see this story reaching it desired end.Perfect Shades of Indigo
(#) kellypassion 2006-11-18
from what you have written so far this is one hell of a story that should be finished at all cast PLEASE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!Perfect Shades of Indigo
(#) ironau 2006-11-23
wonderful story. I've read over 100 harry potter fics, and this is the best development of Harry's Slytherin side ever.
You have a great mix of actiona, tension, plot development and character development in the first 6 chapters.
The one addition that I would love to see is textual joiners between scene changes besides the horizontal line. The horizontial line is over used. working onf creating words which transition a reader from one scene to a next the biggest lack that I see in your writing. Figure that part out, and you will be one of the best.
Keep up the splendid work, and I can't wait to see what happens when Tom finds out that Harry knows the Indigo.
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