Categories > Cartoons > Futurama > Amazon Men in the Mood

Amy to the Rescue

by Tarklandoura 1 review

Amy comes to the rescue of Kif and Leela tags along to find Zapp.

Category: Futurama - Rating: PG-13 - Genres: Humor,Parody - Warnings: [!] - Published: 2007-01-09 - Updated: 2008-01-26 - 814 words

DISCLAIMER: I do not own Futurama. I wrote this story purely for the enjoyment of myself and others, not for economic gain.

Five Hours Later

That night, during the festivities, Zapp was immediately brought to an uns-uns chamber and there all the Amazonian Men lined up for their share of uns-uns with Zapp. All of the men, but one.

"Where Kif?" shouted one of the men, the only one whom like having uns-uns with Kif.

Kif yelped and made a run for it. Being much smaller than the Amazonian man, he was able to hide from him easily and it wasn't long before the Amazonian had lost him and Kif had escaped. Kif sat on a rock, wondering what he should do.

"I must get help," he told himself. "I will find my way back to the Nimbus. There must be a working device on the ship to alert somebody on Earth of our position." So, using courage Kif didn't know he possessed, he ran in the direction of the ship. He got lost a few times, but the feeling of being lost never lasted long and finally, he reached the Nimbus' remains.

He dug through the rubble, hoping to find something of some usefulness, something of some value or worth. Hoping to find something that, well, worked.

And, amazingly enough, though the visual was unable to work, the telephone did. "I will call Amy," he decided. "She'll save us."


Back on Earth, at the Planet Express

"Stop your moping, girl," Hermes told Leela, "You're making us all depressed."

Leela ignored Hermes. She ignored everyone sitting at the table. She wished they'd all go away so she could cry and be depressed in peace. Was Zapp a fake? Did he not like her, not love her? Was this all part of a plan to break her heart? Well, if that was so, he did a damn-good job of it.

Just then, the screen for the telephone flickered and a voice was heard, though no visual came up on screen. "Um...Amy?"

"KIF!" Amy screamed. "Kif! My beloved, Kif." Leela raised her head. Kif...Kif was on duty on Zapp's ship. Perhaps Kif knew what Zapp was doing!

"Amy, I..." began Kif, but Leela interrupted.

"What's Zapp trying to do to me?" Leela asked in a shaky voice. "He never showed up last night!"

"That's because we're deserted on a planet in the uncharted sector."

"Oh...we must rescue them!" Leela and Amy shouted at the same time.

"Here are the coordinates," said Kif and began reading them out.

"We'll be there soon Kify," Amy told him.

"Tell Zapp I'm coming," Leela shouted to him, but Amy had already hung up the phone.


Back on planet Amazonia...

Kif waited for the Planet Express at the Nimbus as he wanted to be as far away from the Amazonian men as possible. He prayed Amy would be quick. He didn't want to have to wait here any longer. He thought of Zapp's strange behaviour. If it was Amazonian / Wo/man he would understand his pleasure in this but they weren't Amazonian Woman, they were Amazonian /Men/. And Zapp was a man. And plus, Zapp had just gotten Leela to like him. Why would he want to give that up so suddenly? Perhaps it was because Zapp thought he'd never see her again and sex with men was better than no sex at all but...Kif shuddered involuntarily. He didn't want to think about it anymore.

Several uneventful hours later...

Kif nearly screamed with delight when he saw the Planet Express ship arrive and land a few feet away from the destroyed Nimbus. The ramp lowered and Amy ran out towards him.

"Amy!" he called, running to meet her (though it hurt his legs from having been sitting on a rock the last few hours).

"Kif! Oh, my wonderful Kify!"

While Kif and Amy began to get mushy and gushy with each other, Leela bolted out of the ship.

"Where's Zapp!?" she cried, storming up to Kif.

"He...he...he's with the Amazonians!" Kif responded.

"The who?"

"The Amazonians."

"Yes, I heard you!" Leela snapped. "Who the hell are they and what is Zapp doing with them?"

"They're the natives of this planet, I think. And..." He didn't dare say what Zapp was doing with them.

All of a sudden, before Leela could speak, there was a loud noise and it felt like a moderate earthquake. Everyone screamed, but then they saw Bender and Fry exiting the ship and relaxed. Everyone relaxed, that is, except Kif.

"Stop being so loud, you two," said Amy.

"Uh...that wasn't Bender and Fry," Kif informed them all.

"Then who was it?" they replied in unison.

There was a pause. "That's the sound of the Amazonian's walking."


To Be Continued...


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