FicWad

I stood behind the camera and watched as Tim and Leah interviewed My Chemical Romance. If it was my choice, I wouldn't have been there, but since I had an internship at the station, I had to be there. Mikey, Ray and Frank all came up to me before the interview, telling me how good it was so see me. And I felt the same way, but seeing Gerard there too made everything worse.

I could tell from where I was standing that Gerard was doing his best to act professional with Tim. I couldn't imagine what he was feeling, but I was glad I didn't have to know. I love Tim. I loved Gerard. This is what I want I kept repeating to myself after my confrontation with Gerard.

As soon as the interview was over, I made my way to the back dressing rooms. I sat in Tim's and waited for him to come. I didn't want to wait out there and run the risk of running into Gerard. The door opened and closed and I looked up, expecting Tim. But guess again. It was Gerard.

"Gerard, get out" I said forcefully. I tried to push my way past him and open the door, but he grabbed me. He held onto me hard enough this time so that I couldn't get out of his grip. He looked at me, his eyes full of sadness.

"Sara. Listen to me. I love you more than anything in the world. I fell in love with you when we were only 13. Whenever I tried to tell you, I just, I dont know what happened. You were either dating someone else or I was just to scared. When I did, I was out. I realize that I made a mistake, telling you I loved you when I did. But that doesn't mean we still don't have a chance at a future. If you can honestly look me in the eye and tell me that you don't have the slighest feelings for me, then I'll leave. But I can't leave knowing that I didn't try my hardest to get you back."

"Why now Gerard? Why after all these years?" My lips began to tremble as Gerards face came close to mine. He parted my lips with his fingers and said, "Because I was still hurt." Then he pushed me up against the wall and started kissing me passionately. I cried while kissing him, but didn't pull away. Instead I kissed him harder, only confusing myself more.
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"I'll be back in a few days okay?" Tim kissed the top of my head. I nodded and watched as he walked towards the departure gates. I was glad that he was leaving. It gave me a chance to think about what I had decided to do. I couldn't believe that I even had to think about what to do. Tim was perfect for me. He loved me and cared for me, but then there was Gerard. I knew what the easier choice was, it just took me a while to make it.

I drove back to my apartment, and by the time I had walked across the parking lot, and into my building, I was soaked. The rain was coming down so hard, and it reminded me of how I felt. I slowly made my way up to my apartment, taking the stairs instead of the elevator. I unlocked the door and threw my purse onto the couch. I flopped down beside and and rolled my head from side to side. I listened to the clock ticking, the rain hitting the window, anything beside my own thoughts. I checked the clock after what felt like an hour. Gerard was going to be here any minute.

I got up from my place on the couch, and quickly changed into pair of Tim's sweats, and one of his black sweaters. I went to the kitchen, and grabbed a beer out of the fridge, knowing that I was going to need a little help with this one. Then my door buzzer went, indiciating that he had arrived. I pressed the little red button, letting him in, and waited for the longest minute in my life. By the time he knocked on the door, my drink was half empty.

I let him in without saying anything and watched as he took a seat where I had been moments before. He motioned for me to sit next to him, but I stood rooted to my spot.

"Gerard, I can't do this." He stood up and crossed the room to stand infront of me.

"But what about the other day?"

"That was a mistake, Gee. Please don't make this harder than it already is."

"Sara. You can't do this."

"Do what?"

"Make mistakes like this. It's just like the time back in highschool. You're not being fair to me, or to yourself."

"Oh screw you Gerard. You don't know a thing about being fair." I walked over and swung my door open, indicating that it was time for him to leave. He leaned in towards me, and whispered in my ear, "Don't do this." His lips brushed my ear, and it sent shivers down my spine.

I took a deep breath, looked him straight in the eye, and told him, "It's time for you to go now." And with that, I shoved him out the door, shut it, and locked it. He banged on the door continuously for a minute, and when he realized I wasn't going to answer it, he left. Good bye Gerard