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• Oaths of Fantasy

  (#) HarryGinnyTonks 2008-04-27

  Interesting beginning. I read it on your site since Ficwad was down initially.
  I assume the pairing will be HarryHermione.
  Looking forward to the next installment...

• Oaths of Fantasy

  (#) GISPERT11256 2008-04-27

  Another fine story you've got here, Puck! Looking forward to Harry putting Peercy in his place whenever Percy's dumb enough to try to do something to Hermione. Especially since it's his own fault for screwing up and earning the reprimand! As a prefect it was his job to see to the safety of ALL the first years so he SHOULD have realized she was missing and at LEAST been the one to inform the professors of the fact, not just assume she was with them the entire time. I never really understood the logic of having the students wandering the halls retuning to their dorms with a troll loose in the castle, ESPECIALLY the Slytherins since their dorms are in the dungeons the area of the castle that according to Quirrel the troll was wandering. It would've made more sense to do a head count in the Great Hall to make sure all students were accounted for and leave them there with soem of the teachers to watch out for the troll. Just the first examlpe of the Wizarding Worlds near total lack of common sense I guess.

• Oaths of Fantasy

  (#) creitros 2008-04-27

  I do believe shalt is the same as shall, but for the person you are speaking to (second person singular), so Harry's message is missing a "not" before touch.
  
  Other than that, I like what you've written so far, and look forward to the next chapter.

• Oaths of Fantasy

  (#) Particle_Accelerator 2008-04-27

  Not a bad first two chapters, but the attempt at what I'll call High Prose has this story feeling clumsy, at least to me. My suggestion is to tone done the ostentatious narration a bit, watch your tenses and punctuation, and explain a bit more of what is going on (i.e. Sidhe, Daughter of Eire, etc) Have fun with this story, but don't get lost in overworked narration.

  Author's response

  Hermione and Harry will research the terms you are looking for. Especially after part of the next chapter.

• Oaths of Fantasy

  (#) Destroyerdrt 2008-04-27

  Percy is a fool he is blameing Hermione for his own mistake I hope the twians pay him back fpr any thing he dose to her before Harry kills him.

• Oaths of Fantasy

  (#) Destroyerdrt 2008-04-27

  one thing you have a good lenagth(spelling?) to your stories not too short or too long.

• Oaths of Fantasy

  (#) Cateagle 2008-04-27

  Interesting chapter that picks up right after the first one. I agree that you've got the relative ages of the Weasley boys off, the Twins are younger than Percy (at least I presume that's who they were picking on), not older. Personally, I'd spell it out as Shall Not instead of Shalt, simply to make things perfectly clear to dunces like Percy.
  
  One other word bothered me, I do believe "...such a reamand..." should be "...such a reprimand...". I'd certainly be interested in being proven wrong, though.

• Oaths of Fantasy

  (#) ALConfederate 2008-04-27

  Shalt is the second person singular present tense of shall, so it should have read "shalt not touch."
  
  Yes, I'm a grammar Nazi; what of it? :)

• Oaths of Fantasy

  (#) jabarber69 2008-04-27

  Yeah I couldnt find this chapter early this morning, but I figured that happens alot on ffnet when you first post a story, so didnt worry.
  
  The first chapter was cool,liked the whole ideal of the sidhe but this second one seems more like a filler.
  
  So is she bonded to him like a slave, concubine, wife...etc.etc.?

• Oaths of Fantasy

  (#) Trini_Randy 2008-04-27

  Not bad...kinda short but i like the update time compared to black phoenix. Lookin forward to the next update

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