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Chapter 9- Time to Say Good-Bye


Gerards POV

I sat in the stiff waiting room, it smelt like anesthetic and cleaning supplies. The walls were covered in flowers and trees that made me want to punch them. How could anyone feel happy in a waiting room? Most likely you are here because someone you know or love was hurt, and yet the hospital put fucking flowers around to make the room cheery? Who came up with this horrible idea?

I should probably call Coraline’s parents, or maybe I should call Ray. Ray and Coraline were really, really good friends. Ray would know what to do. So I flipped open my phone and dialed Rays number.

He picked up on the second ring, “Dude why are you calling me at midnight on a school night?”

“Because, Coraline’s been hurt.” I said plainly and I heard the rustle of something in the background.

“What happened? Where is she? Is she going to be okay?” He asked quickly and I knew he must be getting clothes on to drive here.

“She was raped and then mauled by an animal or something, we are at Clara Maass Hospital, and I don’t know if she is going to be okay. She was almost dead when we brought her here.” I heard Ray stifle a sob and I knew he must be taking this very hard.

“Hey, man, it’s Coraline, she is a fighter, she will make it through,” I said and I heard the starting of an engine.

“I hope you’re right,” Ray said and he hung up.

“Great,” I sighed and a nurse popped her head out of the big push doors leading to the OR.

“Gerard Way?” She asked all of us (which was like three people other than me).

“That’s me,” I said standing up.

“Please follow me,” The lady said and she opened the door up.

I followed her into the long hallway. There were biohazard bags outside every door along with an emergency button and fire alarm.

“I don’t think I should be back here,” I said and the nurse didn’t seem to notice I had said something but stopped outside a door and opened it up for me, “What’s going on?”

“I cant tell you, what I can tell you is that she needs you,” The nurse said, she almost sounded angry as if I was refusing to give a kidney to save someone’s life.

“I don’t think I can handle it,” I said and took a step back.

The nurse took my hand and I noticed I was shaking.

“It’s time to say goodbye,” She said and I felt like something inside me had died.

I took a shaky breath and entered the room. Coraline was sitting on one of the operating tables, cords and tubes were all over her. I held back the tears that came to my eyes and walked over to her bed and took her hand.

“Coral? You there?” I asked and her eyes opened and she turned her head towards me.

“Gerard,” She said quietly and it made my heart squeeze.

“I’m right here, I won’t leave you,” I said and moved closer to her.

“They said I wont make it,” She said quietly but I was happy she was talking.

“I wish I could tell you they were wrong,” I said and laid my head on the corner of the table.
I felt her arm lay on my shoulder.

“I need you to do something for me,” She said quietly and my head shot up.

“What?” I said quickly and she tried to laugh but it came out sounding like she was choking.
“Tell my dad I love him, tell Ray he was the best friend I could ever have, tell Joyce McLeay to never ever forget me, and tell Julia Varana she is a bitch.” Coraline said and I laughed, “Gerard, I never stopped loving you.”

“I know, I always loved you too.” I said and wished I had told her this before.

“When I die, I am going to tell God to keep you on the good list, so you won’t go to hell.” She said and it sounded like she was a little kid.

I smiled and said, “Thanks, but I don’t think it works that way.”

“Why not? If I go to heaven it must mean I have some sense on who is good and who isn’t.” She said and made me laugh again.

“Coral, you’re about to die and yet you can still make me laugh.” I said and she smiled a weak smile at me.

“Yeah, that’s how I work.” She said and closed her eyes, “I think I am going to go to sleep now.”

“Yeah get some rest,” I said and knew that when she fell asleep she wasn’t going to wake up, “I won’t leave you, Coraline.”

“Okay, I wont leave you either.” She said and she yawned.

She fell silent and I watched the heart meter getting ready to hear the beeping stop.

“Is she asleep?” I heard Ray ask from behind me and I jumped.

“Yeah, she is,” I said and I choked back tears.

“The doctors said once she falls asleep she will be in a coma that she cant get out of, and we need to tell her that its time to go.” Ray said unevenly and I knew that he too was trying not to cry.

“Should we wait for her dad to get here?” I asked him and then I heard a tear hit the ground.

“He should get his chance to say good-bye,” Ray said and then I heard the tap of three more tears on the ground.

“Did you call him?” I asked and then I heard the smash of something against a wall.

“WHERE THE FUCK IS SHE?!” I heard the ever-so familiar voice of Mr. Johnson yell from the hallway. Ray poked his head out from the room and waved. Then i heard the running footsteps and knew Mr. Johnson was coming.

“Coraline,” He said and he ran in the room pushing me away from her and took her hand, “Oh honey, this cant be happening, first Wendy and now Coral? This cant be real,” He said and began crying all over the table and on Corals sheets.

“Mr. Johnson,” Ray spoke up, “You have to tell Coraline she can leave, she won’t go until you, or us, tell her it’s okay.”

“IT’S NOT OKAY!” He shouted and we all jumped.

“Mr. Johnson, we know, we loved her too. But she can’t stay in a coma forever, you have to let her move on.” I said and he stood up still clutching her hand.

“Can I at least spend the last memory of my daughter alone?” He asked and both me and Ray stepped out of the room and closed the door behind us.

That’s when Ray broke down; he folded over on himself in the chair and began crying harder than I have ever seen anyone cry. I put a comforting hand on his shoulder. This was the hardest thing I have ever done in my entire life. I hadn’t watched anyone die before, let alone telling them it was okay to die. I didn’t want to leave Coraline, I wanted to be her boyfriend again, I wanted her to live. Ray and I sat there crying together for what seemed like an hour until Mr. Johnson opened the door and walked out. He stared down at us with big puffy red eyes.
“I don’t think I can do it,” He said and then I saw Joyce McLeay running at top speed towards us.

“Am I too late?” Joyce said gasping for breath as she approached our scene.

“She’s sleeping,” I said because it didn’t seem like Mr. Johnson or Ray could say anything.
I realized the tears that were streaming down Joyce’s face and I stood up and grabbed them all, we all stood there hugging and crying.

I built up the courage to talk and said, “I think we should tell her good-bye now,” We all nodded and walked into the room. There was a puddle of tears by Coraline and I was sure it was Mr. Johnson’s.

Ray was the first to walk up, he took her hand and kissed her forehead, “CJ,” He began, “How the hell did you get so accident prone?” We all smiled, “It’s time for you to go now, Coral, I swear to god I will miss you more than a fat boy misses pie after thanksgiving. Don’t forget me when you’re in heaven, okay? I promise I won’t forget you,” He said and kissed her forehead again, I noticed a tear had fallen in her hair.

Joyce was next and she flung herself onto Coraline, holding onto her chest and sobbing incredibly hard. “Coraline, I won’t ever stop being your best friend, even when you’re gone. Coral, how am I going to live without you? I love you, Coraline.” Joyce said and sobbed even harder. Mr. Johnson walked up and peeled Joyce away from Coraline and pulled her into his arms like she was his kid. Joyce cried the tears we all held; they spouted down her face like a waterfall and joined the puddle of tears on the floor. Finally she let go of Mr. Johnson and walked back over to Coraline and gave her a big hug and kissed her on the cheek, “You can go, Coraline, I love you.”

Joyce walked over and gave Mr. Johnson a big hug and then walked to ray who held onto her as they both cried.

Mr. Johnson knelt down to his almost-dead daughter and began whispering things I couldn’t hear, and then he began to talk louder, “Pumpkin, I love you so much, don’t ever forget that. We all love you and care for you, that’s why we want you to be pain-free and peaceful. Go to heaven, love, and tell your mother that I love her and miss her.” Mr. Johnson kissed his daughter and gave her his last hug then he stepped away and let me towards her.

“Hey Coral,” I said as I grabbed her hand and knelt by her bedside, “I love you,” And that’s all I needed to say because I kissed her on the lips again even though they were cold and dead, and she didn’t kiss back. “It’s time for you to leave now Coral, just remember we love you. I love you Coral, and I won’t leave until the end. I promise I will stay. Let God take you in now Coraline, because he will love you just as much as we do. I love you, Coral.” As if my words had done it the heart meter went off and I heard the rush of nurses coming to our room.

“DON’T!” I shouted as they grabbed the AED and started moving us away, “She would want it this way.” I turned and looked back at Coraline and saw the last of the color in her face drain away as if someone had sucked it out with a vacuum.
I felt a hand on my shoulder and didn’t bother to look back, no one could comfort me now.


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