Categories > Books > Harry Potter > JEDI POTTER
Chapter 28
18 reviewsHarry makes a mistake and Dobby leaves. He takes training up another notch, Harry recruits another ally, sets fire to a building quotes Nietzsche and gets in trouble. Rita Writes, and it's time for...
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Reviews
JEDI POTTER
(#) hammerhead 2011-01-14
Great chapter and thanks for the time and effort you put into your storiesAuthor's response
Thanks, Hammerhead. (I knew a guy in the Corps we called Hammerhead. Of course, not to his face!)
Writing this is both challenging and rewarding.
Tell your friends.
AlorkinJEDI POTTER
(#) Richardc269 2011-01-16
Have to agree with Hammer. Another good chapter. I hope you update soon!Author's response
Thanks, Richard. Glad you're enjoying the ride.
AlorkinJEDI POTTER
(#) twilliams1797 2011-01-17
Well, I don't think I'm up to leaving a ten thousand word review...
I see the treatment of Trelawny as a form or therapy, where she has to realize the lengths Harry will go to help her..and possibly help her break the compulsions on her own.. plus having 'seen the truth ' she will make quite a prophet somewhere down the road.
Thinking about the lightsabers, Luna's would be like one of those color changing LED lights.. cycling through various colors, either in a pattern or since it's Luna, something quite random.
It would be interesting if after the battles and Tom is dead that they find out that their intimacy is killing off assorted DEs, and they realize they could have taken more opportunities to get with the program..
as always, enjoying the story.
Hope you and your daughter are well and healthy, employed and happy.
TimWAuthor's response
Heya T,
No need for the uber long reviews, (though I like to see them.)
He gave her a chance, because he felt he had to. From her point, he was a jailer, so she would not be disposed to understanding his point of view. Unfortunately the compulsions were just too strong to fight.
On the other hand, when this is all over, she may just see a different aspect of her gift. I believe Sybil was a mediocre seer at best. Her personality and lack of talent would tend to put people off, and unless one has the gift, any teaching she did would be of the sideshow variety.
One thing she will learn, however is that she placed her trust in an undeserving person.
Multi-colored lightsabers: While well within Luna's character, I can only think of one way to make it happen and still have a functional blade. She's have to have several crystals of different colors and a switching system that shifts the exciter from one to the next. It would have to be really large, or not very strong.
H/Hr, will discover very soon before the final battle how their intimacy is affecting Tommy. Her words will be: "Let's see how much we can hurt that bastard!"
Thanks for the well wishes.
AlorkinJEDI POTTER
(#) davelister2 2011-01-26
Hi, I don't usually review fics, I know, you hate me, blah blah. I have to wonder though, one of the italians, purely random or a slight hint at another source? I am of course referring to Mr Auditore, possibly a decendant of Signore Ezio perhaps?Author's response
Hello, Davelister.
I don't hate you, and I'm glad you like the story. I typically receive one review for every one hundred people who look at the story. Not too bad, I think.
Signore Auditore: Actually, I found the name in a list of commn surnames, and worked from there, I did, however, see the reference to Ezio Auditore, and figured 'what better name for a cop than one who listens?'
AlorkinJEDI POTTER
(#) Wolfkin 2011-01-31
Another great chapter, though I understand the need for the . . . "less savory" parts of the chapter. As to that, might we hope that when Snivelous dies, it'll by a lightsabre slicing off 1" at a time, starting with the toes? I'll admit, a part of me wants to see him "taken" by a draft horse, see how he enjoys the experience, but then I think how difficult it'd be to sterilize a horse's penis and . . . evil, evil grin
Good job with the Longbottoms. I agree with your reasoning, though I fully expect Neville to be truly /pissed/(american definition) when he first finds out. I can just "hear" Harry now when Nev demands to know why he kept the info from him and Harry just calmly saying something like, "So you be here to yell at me."
Glad to see some of the memory charms on Figgy were able to be removed. I also love the scene with the micro-bogs (Sarah & Kyle).
All in all, a great read. Keep'em coming! ^_^Author's response
HJeya Wolfkin.
Thanks for your understanding. I really hated writing that part.
Snape. Yeah, he's a real bastard, and his eventual punishment will incorporate a lightsaber, but he's not gonna die. I have something much worse in store for him! (I'll see your evil, evil grin and raise you a BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!)
Seriously, I thought long and hard about what to do to him. Death is too good for monsters like that. They need to know the true meaning of suffering!
Neville: Erm...actually I had planned on: "This way, you're alive to hit me. You're angry, but you're alive." I might want to use your version though. It's less wordy.
Micro-bogs. Snicker! I've never heard kids called that!
thanks for your input. More is on the way.
AlorkinJEDI POTTER
(#) Zucht 2011-04-06
Love the story. Your Hermione character reminds me of a song... that I can't remember the title of, but it was about a man who treated his woman like 'an angel during the day and a Lady late at night' or something like that?
Anyway, I am enjoying reading and looking up words that are new or unfamiliar. I haven't used a dictionary so much since the last time I read P.G.Wodehouse. My on-line dictionary did fail me when you used the term 'jodie', could you tell me what that is?Author's response
Heya Zucht!
I haven't read Wodehouse, but I have read both Melville, and Elliot. It's interesting to see how difficult it can be to read something in English where one speaks American. As George Bernard Shaw said: "England and America are two countries separated by a common language."
Jodies are the sing-song cadences soldiers use to maintain pace and rhythm when marching or running. The lead will call out a phrase and the group will provide the refrain.
Almost any song can be used, (Ref: the Mickey Mouse song in 'Full Metal Jacket', and my particular favorite, 'Do Wah Diddy') Not only does it help develop camaraderie but is also great for breath control.
AlorkinJEDI POTTER
(#) NobleK 2013-09-03
"Albie got around the monitoring charms, by not actually saying: “Crucio.” "yn llethu artaith!”is Welsh for ‘overwhelming agony’ (Free Online English to Latin Translator) Effectively the Cruciatus, but with a different name. Albus Dumbledore is, after all, a politician first and foremost…the lowest, most unscrupulous form of criminal life on Earth." Considering what polticians have done to my country(Ireland, c. Summer 2013, I COMPLETELY agree with you! transfigures ex-Taoiseach into bug and squashes itAuthor's response
Shakespeare was right. “First, we must kill all the lawyers” Macbeth, act I, scene II (I believe) however I prefer to use the word ‘Politician’ instead of ‘Lawyer’ because Lawyers have some use.
AlorkinJEDI POTTER
(#) Bronze 2015-09-11
But Alorkin, Snape would say something like that as his master IS getting more and more insane as time goes on. And saying that would flatter Moldisnorts ego enough that he wouldn't torture Snape. As a side note, it'd be really poetic if Harry could use the nanites the same way on Moldysnorts as Dumblydork. Leave both alive but as squibs. Then give them joint living quarters and let them kill each other or argue to their hearts content. What a fitting end to both of them.
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