Categories > Books > Harry Potter > The Acts Of Betrayal
Reviews
The Acts Of Betrayal
(#) BARON1941 2008-05-08
That was a great story and i love the way you got rid of tom i do not think i have ever seen it done that way before great job.Overall i would give this story a 9 out of 10 excellent job.I look forward to reading many more stories from you in the future hopefully you have lots of new story ideas floating around in your headkeep up the graet work.
P.S. I loved it when daphne called pansy parkinslut awesome!!!The Acts Of Betrayal
(#) daled73 2008-05-08
I for one am gladyou did Riddle in in a way other than chop him up or blow him up or drill him with a .50 cal muggle bullet. Not that any of those are bad, mind you, but yours is different. And that is good.
My complaint is your proposal scene with Neville and Hannah. Hannah HAS met Nev's Grandmother back in the Hospital Wing in Chapter 16, and the plot break is significant. Now if she said something like "I haven't really gotten to know your Grandmother...." or something, that would work much better.
As for using Magic against Riddle, what does it matter if its a forgotten Oath or a Reducto to the chest that does him in?
Murphy's 20th Military Law: If it's stupid, but it works, it ain't stupid. ...
Author's response
- I thought up that ending about a year ago and wrote the fic to use it...
- Yeah, I boogered up the meeting Grandma thing. It's fixed now.The Acts Of Betrayal
(#) watertiger 2008-05-08
Great Funny Ending tounge in cheek writing. Quite a different ending than most. I hope you aren't tired of writing we always need a reson to smile and laugh.
Cudos and chocolate kissesThe Acts Of Betrayal
(#) Wolfric 2008-05-08
I think that Riddles end is ingenius. I did think that the canon epilog was a bit inappropriate; I don't think Harry and Hermione would name any children after Snape in this world. Thanks for writing. W.The Acts Of Betrayal
(#) issabissa 2008-05-08
Very interesting!!!! I loved every bit of it. Keep up the great work!!! I love d every bit of it. however I was confused as to the reason for the inclusion of the Epilogue from Deathly Hallows. Other then that I think you have a very much wonderful story on your hands!The Acts Of Betrayal
(#) Cateagle 2008-05-08
I'll have to state that I quite liked using a modification to a "simple" charm to defeat Dumbles. I somehow doubt that anyone but a muggle-born or muggle-raised would've thought of that particular approach since Purebloods seem pretty ignorant of basic chemistry and physics.
Now, the one approach that'd be good for near-slapstick in taking Dumbles down would be to hit Dumbles with a Barba Maxima spell and give him a beard so long he keeps stumbling and tripping on it.The Acts Of Betrayal
(#) BJH 2008-05-09
Actually, I really liked the joke of having the canon Epilogue, and by exptension the whole last book of canon, be a figment of Ginny's imagination.
I also appreciate your gentleness in dispensing judgement on Ron and Ginny. They pay for what they did but still get some measure of redemption. Ron dies a hero and Ginny gets to live out a pleasant fantasy that is all she ever wanted.
BJH
P.S. Nice story btw. Well done and concise.The Acts Of Betrayal
(#) banner 2008-05-09
Nicely satisfying ending - I love that most of the worst offenders created their own destruction. McG is the only one who got away scott-free, and I suspect that the loss of respect from Harry&Co will haunt her for the rest of her professional life. I'll always wonder whether AD had her under some sort of control.
Thank you.Author's response
- I think it was more she believed in the man, and couldn't conceive that he would do anything wrong.The Acts Of Betrayal
(#) zaphod 2008-05-09
Loved the you may kneel part. Excellent. You should have called the ending /18.9 Years Later/, and twist the knife a little bit more for the whiners out there.Author's response
- Hey, if you've got Mr. I'm so bad MegaWizard by the short and curlies, it never hurts to twist a bit...
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