Categories > Books > Harry Potter > JEDI POTTER
Chapte 20
19 reviewsKinda slow chapter. Mostly dialogue. Harry has a few gusts over, the Dursleys go to court, and Dudley tells his story,
5Ambiance
Reviews
JEDI POTTER
(#) Wolfric 2010-08-22
Good chapter. It would be of some interest to know generally what the visitors reports said and how they were recieved. Thanks for writing. W.Author's response
Heya Wolfric.
You'll get a synopsis of those report in next chapter.
AlorkinJEDI POTTER
(#) Narutofan0 2010-08-22
I enjoyed this chapter. Anytime the Dursleys get their just deserts in a story is enjoyable. You are weaving a great story keep it up.
As for the taboo being on the morsmordre being stupid I disagree. To the Ministry of Magic and magicals in general the secrecy of their world is important. A floating symbol like that would not be good for keeping that secret. I am sure that is one of the reasons the Death Eaters cast it.Author's response
Thanks 'fan,
I know I'm gonna catch hell from many reviewers as to why I didn't have the Dursleys roasting on a spit, but I figured this way was more painful for them. (Snicker!)
The taboo: While the floating Dark Mark is bad for the secrecy stature, it's usually the last thing done before the Deez scram. Basically my point is this. They apparently love to start out their playtime with a few rousing bouts of Crucios, so why not set the taboo on that? If the taboo was set to Cruciatus, or the AK, they'd be under fire -before- they got the chance to send up the Dark Mark. Casualties would be reduced and perhaps the ranks would be...thinned.
AlorkinJEDI POTTER
(#) vheritas 2010-08-22
Excellent chapter, with some really fine writing, especially the scenes with Dudley.
I thought your punishment was most apt.Author's response
Thank you, Vheritas. I fear there will be many who disagree, but thank you all the same.
AlorkinJEDI POTTER
(#) jabarber69 2010-08-23
Hey I dont know why you were down on this....as per all talking it was GREAT!Author's response
Hey Jarbarber,
A lot of reviewers prefer action scenes. (though in this case, it was kinda split.)
AlorkinJEDI POTTER
(#) erik 2010-08-23
A well written chapter, especially the trainees showing up the professionals in the nicest possible way. And a great court scene, although I thought if they were sentenced to thirty years house arrest, why are the ankle bracelts for twenty?Author's response
Heya Erik.
It was a lot of fun showing the Pro's that the Jedi students could do it better faster and stronger. When I was a SEAL, I was in fabulous shape. That's the kind if shape I have the Jedi Trainees in.
Thirty -v- twenty: Aah, crap! I blew it. I originally decided on twenty years, but decided to up it to thirty. I missed the second reference. It's been corrected.
AlorkinJEDI POTTER
(#) Teresa 2010-08-23
Many thanks for another well written and detailed chapter! Dudley has come a long way, and his discussion with the judge showed how hard he had worked to throw off his parents influence. As you mentioned, he was the only one in canon to actually realize what he had done to Harry. As for Vernon and Petunia, I think that Harry went for justice, not only punishment, and it does work out better than locking the pair up and losing the key. Though I have to admit Vernon having an up close and personal meeting in a place like Oz's cellblock H does interest me...... sighs. The meeting with the Queen was also very good, and I seeing how Harry and his troops showed their visitors what the training entailed. Amelia and Augusta may be able to get their changes through the Wizengamot with better dispatch now that research can be expedited.......and it might help them make sure that the physical evidence of inappropriate laws and proceedures isn't "lost". It can only help Amelia and company's cases against Dumbles and the DE's to have that kind of proof. And as always, seeing Snape suffering just warms my heart. It's a pity that Snape didn't hear Draco's reaction to his little "accident" but I'm sure that with Peeves and the other conspiritors on the job there will be other oppourtunities! :)Author's response
Heya Teresa!
Thanks you as well. Your reviews are the kind I look forward to.
I maintain that Dudley was a product of his environment. That he managed to throw off fifteen years of programming, is notable to say the very least. that he was the only one, is also noteworthy.
Vernon/Petunia. I couldn't put them in any prison, because I know what would happen there. It would satisfy, Harry'sdesire for revenge, but it would be over far too quickly.
This way they suffer forever!
The Queen has always struck me as one who cares about her realm. Here, since Harry has told her the Jedi would not be answerable to any one nation, Great Britain included, He and his Jedi-Students, are a potential threat. Not only are the various members, having a great deal of fun, but they're assessing the threat to Britain at the same time. There will be a brief synopsis of the report and a short excerpt in the next chapter.
Dumbleference: He can't interfere for the time being. Actually, he doesnt' know what's going on. Since he's persona non grata around the ministry, nobody will talk to him. Most of his pawns have been removed and neither Alastor nor Arthur will be in the same room with him.
However, those laws, have been there for far too long. Even with assistance, it'll take a long time to dig them out. (When I was in highschool I discovered that we still have laws on the books from colonial days, here in the US.)
Snape/Filch: It was an accident! (Holds right hand up and crosses left fingers behind back.)
I will always provide opportunities to torment Dumbledore, Snape and to a lesser extent Filch. the cat, I'll leave alone since she's a familiar...and I like cats.
AlorkinJEDI POTTER
(#) Shadowdrake 2010-08-24
Using the taboo to track the unforgivables is a decent idea, but sadly flawed. As we've seen in the books, the taboo is not linked to active magic, but the sound itself. So anyone that says Harry Potter survived the Avada Kedavra will trigger the taboo. How long until the public knows that the taboo was moved and the DE avoid that particular incantation?
Mesmordere was a good choice as people didn't use the incantation in conversations and obliviators could be dispatched to preserve secrecy; critically important to the ministry as their very existence depends on it.
So the choice of taboo is not as stupid as you make it out. The best choice without doubt would have been Nagini to track down Tom's hideout, but now I don't know if there is a good choice. Everything but Mesmordere will generate far too many false alerts to be effective.
On another note, the Dursleys punishment is olay, but there's several issues that you didn't account for:
1. Shopping. You allowed them (well Petunia)to visit the grocer, but they'll need clothes, and Dudley school books at the very least; since you specifically mentioned the grocer, this should be mentioned as well.
2. Medical Care: It's indirectly said that they're allowed to receive it, but shouldn't there be proper procedure for them to follow if they needed to? Given all the specifics mentioned, it seems a rather glaring omission.
Anyway, this is a good story. Thanks for sharing.Author's response
It still wouldn't be a problem. Since the Deez love to pay with that curse, and it's unlikely anyone else would, it still get's them caught. If someone else uses it, they're gonna have some fast talking. Unlike the killing curse, I cannot see a reasonable use for the torture curse, which is why I chose it.
My problem with Morsmordre is that they send it aloft just before they skedaddle. When the Aurors arrive, all they have left is bodies.
Nagini will be coming into play by June.
OK: Your specifics:
1. Shopping: For the time being,they won't need anything. the Dursleys have enough clothing to last them at least a year. Hell, I've got shoes that ate ten years old!
And Carolyn is at least a little pro-Dudley. She'll help him out there.
2. Medical Care: Yeah, I blew it there. Of course, We can always use the old wands. Since the muggle police will be made aware if the Dursley's punishment, I'd think any call for medical aid would be responded to, and as quickly evaluated.
AlorkinJEDI POTTER
(#) Teresa 2010-08-24
An accident eh? So that's your story and you intend to stick to it.....chuckle. As for Mrs Norris, I've seen what cats are capable of doing for revenge. My cat Phantom got even with my sister when she ratted him out for fighting with one of the other cats....... his revenge was swift and thorough! Any chance that Mrs. Norris might go after Snape and Dumbles on general principles? I'm sure they've ticked her off on occasion, and cats never forget an insult, no matter how many bribes you give them........ After the crisis is over will the Queen ask Harry to see in any of her troops are force sensistive? It would give Harry another pool of potential students in the future. Who knows, eventually he might have students from other countries as well. He might end up as Grand Master Potter.......or it might be Grand Master Dobby......complete with a gimmer stick/padwan disiplinary device! :)Author's response
Well, of course it was an accident! What else could it have been? (Looks innocently up at sky and whistles theme for Star Wars.)
Mrs.Norris: I'm sure she could be bribed. After all, she wasn't anywhere near. to her, it was also an accident. If she were going to go after anybody, it would be Snape or Draco. (Hey! There's an idear!)
Th3e Queen: It's entirely possible, though unlikely. Refer to my statistics. If one in 10,000, is magical and one in 1000 -magicals- is force sensitive, that would tend to preclude the muggles from having more than a dozen throughout the military. (Because magic is very much like the force) I chose Mackenzie, because he's Hermione's father. She had to have gotten the gift somewhere. Her mother is more magically inclined, though her branch of magic is different than Hermione's.
Other countries will be invited when Harry get's his school opened and his first crop fully trained.
Master Dobby! Absolutely! If anybody deserves to talk backwards and hit people with little gnarled sticks, he does!
Really, though, he will be one of Harry's trainers in the future.
Thanks for the kind words.
AlorkinJEDI POTTER
(#) twistyguru 2010-08-25
I agree with your punishment (and rationale for it) of Vernon & Petunia. Having worked as a psychiatrist in a state prison system, I can validate that, in the US, at least, neither Vernon nor Petunia would have survived long once their crimes were made known (which they ALWAYS are). This punishment makes THEM 'freaks' on Privet Drive--how fitting!
Oh, and if Vernon is Rumpole, then that would make Petunia 'She Who Must Be Obeyed'! urgh....Author's response
Precisely what I was trying to put across. This way, hei punishemt will last until he shows real remorse!
And how likely is that?
'She Who Must Be Obeyed'! (Snicker!)
AlorkinJEDI POTTER
(#) Teresa 2010-08-25
Hmmmmm......here's hoping that Snape, Draco and Dumbles have more "accidents" like that in the future! But with Peeves and company on the job I'd say that the "accidents" are just beginning; in fact Snape, etc haven't seen anything yet! Who knows, perhaps they'll start beliveing fate has it in for them.......(looking innocent) And they're all such upstanding members of society too! Why, it wouldn't suprise me to hear Peeves and his co-conspiritors (I mean "consultants") whistling "I've got a little list" as they prepare their gifts for the victims...er recipients! Nothing but the best for those well deserving people..... it's too bad the twins can't send a few things along as well! :)Author's response
Yes, more pranks are in the offing, but they're meant more as irritating disruptions than anything truly vicious. They'll have to keep Peeves under strict control, because they want the evil overlord and his hench-idiots, to keep thinking these are unrelated accidents. There will be no time or rhythm for them to chart.
Twins: Bite your tongue! I would never deprive the illustrious Gred and Forge, the opportunity to create havoc. It's just that they're busy now. Yeah...busy.
Alorkin
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