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• JEDI POTTER

  (#) Disruptor 2010-11-02

  Well. At least Harry isn't making the same stupity that the KOTOR Jedi and pre-Clone War Jedi made of seperating children from their families. That always irked me.
  
  What is going on with Arabella and her chldren and grandchildren? What is with her being thought dead or her family being thought dead?
  
  Arabella does not have to be a Jedi. Baran Do sage comes to mind or one of the more mental Force paths. Tionne was not that phyiscal a Jedi, but she is/was a healer and historian. Which brings up the next question, does Harry know how to make a holocron? Specifically, can he make a starting Grand Holocron(Dodechedron/12 sided object)?
  
  At least Mack gave Harry some good advice. Why does it have to be Tatooine again? That desert world is really overused. The palace on Onderon with its four moons would be even more overwhelming. Maybe Dxun or Yavin IV. Sorry, just sidetracked a bit
  
  At least Ron is starting to shape up and all it took was him being beaten up by Luna. ^_^ I really thought Ron would have to have his arm chopped off like Rosh Penin did, before he learned humility.
  
  With the way things are going for Dumbles, soon Carolyn will have enough to bring him down. Dumbles forgot one thing: treason against the crown. IF he goes down to that, there is no way any of his written laws can protect him.
  
  At least Cho is growing up. Too bad that she can't have Cedric back. Ah well, maybe someone is in her future. Although when I think of the Changs, I think of the Royal family of Onderon and Freedon Nadd

  Author's response

  Heya Disruptor.
  
  I agree in some ways and in some, I don't. Isolating the children in an all-Jedi environment would tend to let them concentrate fully on their goal. Parents neighbors and schoolmates would distract them. On the other hand, I think the Jedi are horribly stunted, emotionally speaking. I said in chapter two, that the old code allowed for emotion as long as it was controlled, the new code divorces the person from that emotion and that is, I feel, a baaaad idea!
  
  Arabella: Dumbledore needed her to watch over Harry to the exclusion of anything else. I think it would be well within his character to spread a few lies and do some obliviating to make sure.
  
  No, Arabella does not have to be a knight. She can be a chronicler, researcher, librarian, historian, healer, or even creche minder.
  
  Holochrons will not come into play here. Nearly all Yoda's memories of those devices are darkside, and so, he would have kept them from Harry.
  
  Yoda's memories will come into play next chapter, but only for information.
  
  Tatooine: You have to understand that at this point in time, Harry is only familiar with Tatooine, Yavin 4, Hoth, Dagobah, Cloud City on Bespin, and Endor. The movies he's seen parts of, only feature those planets...and the Death Stars, of course.
  
  While he has Yoda's induced memories, Harry has barely looked through them and then only to build the lightsabers and learn to use them.
  
  Ron: Hell, I've wanted to pound that stupid carrot into orange goo, pretty much from the first. In canon, he's lazy, unmotivated, gluttonous, and bigoted. Effectively he's Gryffindor's Malfoy, but without the money.
  
  Here, he's not quite as bad as in canon, but he's immature and lacking in drive. He can be redeemed, so I've given him a chance to live up to his promise. Luna will be using the 'carrot and stick' method of training him, and some painful burns are definitely 'the stick'.
  
  Dumbledore: Pretty much everything Albie has done can be considered treason, and that will come into play at the end of the fic.
  
  Cho: I always thought Cho got a raw deal. First, she was fifteen when Cedric died. Nobody seemed to care in the slightest. Nobody gave her any support, not even a shoulder to cry on. Harry's lack of emotional depth didn't help any either. Though he was raised in an emotionally constipated environment, his interaction over the past four years with Hermione should have taught him at least some kind of sympathy...especially for a girl he was crushing on.
  
  Unfortunately, like most of JKR's characters, Cho is a paper-doll. I decided to flesh out her character just a little. Here, she's still enamoured of Harry, but not to the exclusion of everything else. She likes him, and is willing to marry him, but she really doesn't love him.
  
  To be head Girl she has to be smart, dedicated, and capable, as well a having a backbone(Percy Weasley notwithstanding). Here she uses that backbone to full effect. You'll be seeing her again.
  
  Thanks for the well-thought-out review. I wish all my reviews were like this.
  
  Alorkin

• JEDI POTTER

  (#) celashe 2010-11-02

  Wasn't that quote at the end in response to something in the Civil War? When a messenger from Lee got lost and the ensuing battle was then lost? Small events can have consequences but sometimes no matter how many small events occur the overall consequences remain unchanged. About the story I love it.

  Author's response

  Actually the quote comes from long before our civil war. It was an English nursery rhyme. My mother's line goes back to two retainers of 'William the Bastard' of Normandy (the Howard's and the Dodge's) and I understand it was used even then.
  
  I have found that military truisms are usually correct, so it is entirely possible Lee used it. He was an intelligent and insightful General and would have thought of something like it. Lee would have grown up with such nursery rhymes, as his father, Henry Lee III, was raised in a prominently British influenced environment. During the revolutionary war, he served as a cavalry officer in the Continental Army and was later Governor of Virginia.
  
  Glad you love it. Tell your friends.
  
  Alorkin

• JEDI POTTER

  (#) Cateagle 2010-11-02

  I quite enjoyed that rif on 1 Corinthians, Chapter 13; it was quite appropriate for the circumstances, too, and will go well with pointing them to the Light Side. I can empathize with Luna having to take drastic measures to get Ron properly motivated and working/studying; methinks she end up with a much better Ron as a partner than the Ron of canon. I like that he's expanding thier training to make them very well equipped to survive 'most anywhere; in the long run this will prove most beneficial and in the short run it gives them more well-earned confidence.
  
  The discussion with Arabella Figg was fascinating and I can see her filling roles that would free others up for dealing with other urgent jobs; it's a win/win for all concerned. I also imagine that there's more info in her journal that'll be of help to Carolyn in going after Albus. I'm glad Harry moved Neville's parents into Potter Castle; they can't be used as pawns there and I suspect examining them in the Force might produce some useful results toward healing them. The same thing applies with Sybil Trelawny and healing her (wonder if she's Force sensitive and, if so, if her gifts would improve with training).
  
  The scene at Hogwarts was amusing and I like that Cho is living up to the responsibilities of being Head Girl and not taking any guff nor showing deference to any. I'm certain Draco will try some revenge but I suspect it's just going to earn him even more hurt. Albus' reaction to the controls Amelia's putting into place is enlightening and amusing as he finds a truly even playing field to be so very undesireable for his plans; I suspect he's in for even more headaches as matters progress (I suspect his reactions to the removal of the Longbottoms and Sybil will be entertainingly pyrotechnic and quite futile).
  
  I believe that quote goes back to way before the civil war; what celashe may be remembering is the incident where Lee's messenger dropped a bunch of cigars with a message around them; Union forces recovered the whole thing and brought Lee to battle. Unfortunately, McClellan was still commanding the Union forces and once again brought a draw out of what should have been an outright win (ISTR that it was the battle of Antietam but it's been a while since I reviewed the history of the War Between the States).

  Author's response

  Heya Cat!
  
  Funny thing is, I'm a Buddhist(Nicherin Daishonin), but I've read through both old and new testament at least a couple times each. There are a few passages that always seem to stand out. That's one of them. It seemed to fit the situation so well I hadda use it.
  
  I feel for poor Luna, but I had her in mind for Ron from the train ride home. Since even here, he's lazy and under-motivated, I knew Harry would have to deal with him sooner or later. This was what I was aiming at from the start of training.
  
  Training and confidence: Precisely!
  
  Arabella: Harry was most concerned with getting her away from Dumbledore. What she decides to do in the future is up to her. Judith will teach her the basic techniques she needs, to touch the force, but from then on, she'll be a walk on.
  
  Carolyn isn't going to have to do much to Albus. He's going to pretty much do himself.(And so far, he's been doing a bang-up job!) Her primary job is to keep him off balance until Harry does the nasty.
  
  Longbottoms: I had that idea as well. In the next chapter, I've arranged for one of the trainees to transfer to medical as a conscientious objector, and become a healer. If you've paid attention you'll know who. I'm thinking she'll begin to make some progress with the Longbottoms, though it wont' be the instant cure Radaslab used. That was a good idear, but I can't justify it. It might be something along those lines, though.
  
  Trelawney: I'm still not decided what to do with her. I can stuff her into a stasis tube, which would be the safest move, but Harry has a noble streak about him, Blast! He'd want to take care of her. If I let her go and the blood-based compulsions are there, it could prove disastrous. Even if Dumbledore can't breach the wards, he'd get word to Tommy and he'd have his badly dressed social club hanging on Harry's doorstep from then on in.
  
  Sybill Force training: Don't know. If anything, that's for the future.
  
  Cho: As I said, She got a raw deal in canon. Here, I'm making it up to her.
  
  Draco: He will and it will.
  
  Albie: Count on it! As for discovering the absence, he left Sybill to starve. He doesn't care about her. She was simply a pawn who'd outlived her usefulness. As for the Longbottoms, he's too busy trying to salvage his own image to check for the time being, and by the time he does, it'll be too late.
  
  Who was Lee's messenger working for? There is absolutely no way that was an accident. "Gee Boss, I knew I had it somewhere! I guess I forgot and wrapped my cigars in that top secret dispatch so no one could find them, but the on the way here I left them somewhere on the road, kinda near the Union lines. Could'a happened to anyone!"
  
  Alorkin

• JEDI POTTER

  (#) Rob 2010-11-02

  Nice part. Actually nice to see Ron improving, as long as he doesn't go all Sith. :)
  
  

  Author's response

  Hey Rob.
  
  Ron has his problems and Luna has some of the answers. In this story he is at risk of becoming a Sith. there is nothing to say he /will/.
  
  Alorkin

• JEDI POTTER

  (#) zamia 2010-11-03

  G'day mate, good to see Voldie get a few more headaches. Nice the way you got Arabella into finding out what she has been missing and also Harry starting to think of future students. Bit of a weird way to propose to Hermione. Hopefully they can use Trelawney either at the Castle or if she leaves, she goes with enough misinformation to stuff up Dumbles again. Would be nice to see Dumbles run into Amelia's office while she was in discussion with Carolyn. Now that Flopsey recognises Harry as the heir, he should be able to use the Hoggy elves to help his cause. Still a good read. Cheers.
  Z

  Author's response

  Hey Zamia.
  
  Yeah, anytime Ol' Voldy is out of sorts is good in my book.
  
  Arabella is an important part of Harry's life, whether he enjoyed her company notwithstanding. I couldn't just leave her there.
  
  Future students. That's what Yoda had in mind when he said: "After that, if wish you to become Jedi, seek out and train younglings, you must. Only then, a true Jedi will you be.”
  
  Weird way: Funny thing, actually. I didn't intend for that to happen. It just wrote itself. Don't worry, if Harry survives, he'll do a proper job of it.
  
  Trelawney. I'm still undecided as to her fate. I can't allow her to leave the castle at all. Once she left, she'd realize she wasn't where she thought she was and the compulsions Dumbledore placed on her could have her telling him where she was. In either case, as soon as she was back in his hands, he'd either put her to sleep again or arrange for an 'accident'. Like most of his pawns, she's expendable.
  
  Flopsey, Basically yeah. It won't be too overt, but if they detect a prank or the like, or if Harry needs to enter the castle undetected (as McGonagall intimated) the house elves will turn a blind eye.
  
  Until next time...
  
  Alorkin

• JEDI POTTER

  (#) Wolfric 2010-11-03

  Fine chapter. Are Mopsy and Cotton Tail there as well? I don't know much Sar Wars lore so a good bit of what a couple of the reviewers have discussed passed me by. However I do think the story is well written and I like the way the characters are developing. Thanks for writing. W.

  Author's response

  Thanks Wolfric. Last I heard, Mopsy and Peter were hanging with the 142nd street Thumpers. Dangerous group of rabbits there!
  
  Star Wars lore: I had to do a fair bit of studying myself. I'm glad you like the show.
  
  Alorkin

• JEDI POTTER

  (#) Wonderbee31 2010-11-03

  First off, wonderful chapter! You continue to catch on with a Harry who is doing his best to get things set up so Tom goes down, hopefully with very little swinging. I've got a feeling that Draco is going to end up trying something extremely stupid, and here's hoping he gets smacked hard for it, hard enough that it'll take that time. I also like how Cho continues to blossom in this fic, and do also feel she got a raw deal in the canon, that and Harry must've had his crush because it was needed at the time, not because of any real feeling that JKR would've developed on her part, heaven forbid she actually have her characters grow up, instead keeping them in a basic timeloop for the whole series.

  Author's response

  Heya Wonderbee!
  
  Thanks.
  
  It's hard to write a powerful Harry story that doesn't have him all knowing and all seeing. Here, I've tried to keep him as close to canon as possible, but with a bit more brains and a lot more spine. Here, he understands he is only one man and so has set up alliances with people who can help him attain his goal of a Voldy-free world. To him, anything beyond that is gravy.
  
  
  Draco's stupidity: This is Draco. Is there any other way? He'll be getting his slap-down in March.
  
  Cho: I agree. She was Harry's crush for small parts of three books, but other than a temper tantrum there was no real settlement there. Le sigh!
  
  Rowling: She should have stuck to adventure stories.
  
  Alorkin

• JEDI POTTER

  (#) sargentaaron2004 2010-11-04

  The version i have always been taught is as follows:
  
  For want of a nail the shoe was lost.
  For want of a shoe the horse was lost.
  For want of a horse the rider was lost.
  For want of a rider the battle was lost.
  For want of a battle the kingdom was lost.
  And all for the want of a horseshoe nail.
  
  But your version still held the basic premise, i also liked your quote from Corinthians.

• JEDI POTTER

  (#) sargentaaron2004 2010-11-04

  There is also this Variation, which is somewhere between both our versions that i found on wikipedia.org:
  For want of a nail a horseshoe was lost,
  for want of a horseshoe a horse went lame,
  for want of a horse a rider never got through,
  for want of a rider a message never arrived,
  for want of a message an army was never sent,
  for want of an army a battle was lost,
  for want of a battle a war was lost,
  for want of a war a kingdom fell,
  and all for want of a nail.

  Author's response

  Like I said, there are several different versions.
  
  The version I learned was from Mr Roger Figge, (Fig-ee), one of the finest history professors I have ever met. He inspired a D average student to learn about the world we came from.
  
  Alorkin

• JEDI POTTER

  (#) TurtleBlue 2010-11-04

  I like the fic except the Ron angle. When I come across his section in the fic I am mentally reaching for the Caer brand of brain bleach! To compound this destruction of my limited brain cells Luna needs to have to sully her bod and faerie-like qualities to help keep Harry's dumbles morals in pristing condition!
  
  I believe a better person to "instruct" Ronnie in the way of the force would be Eloise Midgen. She would be motivated after his comments during the Yule Ball announcement by prof. Kitty.

  Author's response

  Hello, TurtleBlue.
  
  I've made this Ron somewhat less of an asshole than he was in canon. Here, he's loyal and brave. Unfortunately, he's still lazy and less than highly motivated, but like any dog, he can learn.
  
  Luna: I actually started her pairing up with Ron in chapter four, and have made mentions of it three times since.
  
  Dumbledore's morals: not exactly. harry is willing to chuck his first friend into the tank for the benefit of his group. Dumbledore is willing to sacrifice every single person he has in order to redeem a few who have deliberately placed themselves beyond redemption.
  
  Eloise Midgen: You know, I completely forgot about her. I was looking up names in Lexicon for my student list, and I must have missed her. Sorry.
  
  Alorkin

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